Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Modern Family

So I had an interesting situation present itself at the coffee shop the other day...I was sitting at the Beanery over off Park st. getting some studying done. I was in the middle of a great chapter in Dallas Willard's "The Divine Conspiracy" when this lady walked in. She had a little bit of a hippie vibe to her, a little earthy if you will. She immediately recognized the woman who was sitting next to me who was in her late 30's - early 40's, wearing workout clothes with lots of makeup on. (not earthy at all)They proceeded to exchange pleasantries and started to catch up on life.

My hippie friend didn't seem to have much in the arena of volume control, and proceeded to have a very public/private conversation with the Stepford wife sitting across from her. As I listened to their conversation, this is what I gathered.

The "flower child" had just recently gone through a divorce - the paperwork had been finalized last August. She was currently going on a few dates with a guy that had just broken up with a mutual friend of the two ladies at the coffee shop. There was some drama coming from this situation - and it was definitely coming from our earthy friend. She seemed to have a flair for the dramatic in an especially gifted way.

Mean while, her ex-husband (whom she had just divorced) has since "traded teams" and is now dating a guy in town. Our hippie friend is ok with this however because at least this guy treats her 2 kids well.

As the conversation continued, I couldn't help but have a deep sadness creep over me. I felt sad for this lady who has had to endure the pain of divorce, all the while presenting an "everything is great" attitude to this other lady in the coffee shop. I felt sad for the Stepford wife who didn't have anything of substance to offer in terms of genuine friendship. I felt sadness for the husband who is overcompensating during this painful time with a pendulum swing to the complete opposite side. But most of all I felt and still feel a deep sadness for her kids. Kids who have to add these things to their story, and deal with the repercussions of their parents mishaps for the rest of their lives.

Sadly this is the 3rd time in the last 4 months that I have heard almost this exact same scenario. A divorce happening with one of the parents immediately entering into a homosexual relationship. As a youth pastor I deal with a lot of the fall out of situations like this. Kids that are hurt, confused, and eventually convinced that this is "normal". That this is what family looks like. That this is how to deal with conflict and temptation. That the happiness of the individual trumps the responsibility that one has in the family unit.

How we desperately need to re-establish how life is meant to be lived in this day and age. How desperately this town needs Jesus.

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About Me

I'm a follower of Jesus, Husband to a beautiful wife, father to an amazing boy, and Pastor to wonderful people. I live in Alameda with my wife Natalie. I love food and have secret aspirations of being a chef. I would also love to live in the mountains some day, and have a closet full of flannels.